we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
my god I love twenty year old dicks
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Randomize
