What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Randomize
