I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize