your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
we should paint friendship bongs
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