Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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