giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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