matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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