so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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