I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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