so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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