my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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