I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Randomize
