Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize