You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
