my mouth tastes like poor choices
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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