a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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