I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Randomize
