I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Randomize
