Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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