GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
