Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
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