im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
