anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
