What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
