You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
