Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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