we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize
