mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
