I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
