What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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