I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize