you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
