im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
do herpes really smell.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
