I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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