you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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