yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Walk of Shame today included voting.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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