would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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