shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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