Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Help. Why am I so naked?
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