I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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