Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Randomize
