whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
