i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
