Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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