im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
