if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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