just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize