first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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