i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
