No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize